Lyssa’s getting married and I have stepped in (and by “stepped in” I mean strong-armed my awesomeness) to be her online matron of honor. But I’m not the only person who wants to liquor her up on her big day. YOU come in too…..
Hello my Psychos!
As you all may or may not know…..*dramatic pause*…..I am getting married.
(And by know, I mean you’ve all vomited every time you’ve seen the words “wedding” or “love” or “matrimonial discharge” on my blog in the past 6 months. I’m sorry…that you all have such weak stomachs.)
At some point in this journey, Emily from The Waiting very bitchily declared herself my online bridesmaid, and I said she could gladly have the honor as long as I got the naming rights to her next child. I can’t wait to meet Sylvester P. Asskicker and give him/her ve’s first dangerous sharp object.
But Melissa, you’re thinking, What does the “p” stand for?
You ready for this jelly?
…Pootytang.
You’re welcome, little bundle of sex appeal that has yet to exist!
But I digress. Emily’s bitchiness, besides adding kindling to the fiery rage within…
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The Waiting 
Hahaha!
On my way!
Yes!
Great, no, hilarious, share!