Meanwhile, Back On the Twitter…

No real post today. I’m working on a piece that may actually be published and trying to get Children’s Week on Tipsy Lit all put together. Whenever times like these come and I don’t have as much time as I usually do to write the highly important blog posts you have come to expect, I usually hit up the Twitter a little more. This is probably healthier for us all, as poison in 140-character hits kills you slower than the full dose.

Here are a few of the things I’ve been tweeting about lately. Apparently I’m doing something right because The Huffington Post’s Parents section retweeted me on my birthday after I said something about Cee eating sand. I shared my Twitter fame with her playgroup and they were decidedly underimpressed.


As Ashley pointed out, it’s like melting a piece of American cheese on a tortilla and calling it a quesadilla.

It’s kind of like getting caught naked inside a meme. 

Sid’s friend Gerald has a bright future ahead of him as one of those people who stands in public squares screaming conspiracy theories at unsuspecting bystanders.

I had a really hard time getting this one to catch on.

I ruin her life. 

Perfect the “wet look” with Hidden Valley.

If you are truly lacking for mental stimulation and would like more of this, please follow me on Twitter @thewaitingblog. I don’t live tweet anything because we only pick up PBS with our TV antennae, so you can expect an interrupted stream of poop updates and commentary on snack crackers even when the Oscars are on.


  1. Congrats on the HP retweet. You have to admit, your tweet was pretty stellar.

    1. Too bad it’s totally true-to-life.

  2. NotAPunkRocker · · Reply

    Awesome retweet!

    Removing the second letter of my name still gives me my name with no fun new pronunciation. :-/

    1. Maybe try writing your name backwards? That’s always kind of fun. You can call me Ylime ;D

  3. I think I’d crap my pants if HP retweeted me! Congrats on that. I just recently discovered lists on Twitter, so I’m really starting to get this social networking/technology thing down. :) But I relate very much to your parenting twitter sound bites. Good job!

    1. Thanks! I’m not gonna lie; it was a big thrill and I wouldn’t complain if it happened again. My mom was thrilled too. She was all over her Facebook saying “My daughter was in the Huffington Post!!!!!” I didn’t have it in me to tell her what a small deal a retweet actually is ;D

  4. I echo Speaker7’s sentiment above. And it’s nice to see someone else with fairly amateur clip-art/paintbrush skills.

    1. Thanks, Sean! What’s funny is that the very computer I used to create that “art” (if you want to call it that) is loaded with all kinds of fancy-schmancy photoshop software because my husband makes digital art, but I have no idea how to use it and so I just stick with the same Microsoft paint that I have been using since 2001.

  5. I love your tweets, I admit I’m a little envious that you seem to have an easy time with the quick one-liners! I am horrible with Twitter, still new to it and too scared to tweet anything half the time and when I do I instantly regret it… Congrats on HuffPo! So cool!

    1. Thanks, Gretchen! I used to be scared to say things on Twitter because I thought I was going to get in trouble, but then I realized that barely anyone read my tweets anyway.

  6. Wow! Babies as blog, twitter, guest blog and published work material!
    I have to start cranking out some wonderful little story generators. ;)

    Congrats on all the good things!

    1. Thanks, Guap. Be sure to post a birth story. C’s birth story was the biggest blog day I’ve ever had (other than FP) and I’m tempted to make another kid for the stats alone.

      1. Umm…I think I’ll just go with the next naked bar story. I still get daily search term hits for those.
        Creepy, creepy search term hits…

  7. I totally agree about Gerald. His voice is so jarring.

    1. He is such a little lunatic.

  8. If I was in your playgroup, I would’ve been TOTALLY impressed. Good job!

    1. I’ll bring the watered-down apple juice if you bring the Goldfish crackers ;D

  9. Gotta get back on Twitter, eh! Great tweets ;)

    1. Thanks, Pixie! ;D

  10. You’re one of my Twitter faves. Good luck with all your shiny projects!

    Jnnie ;)

    1. You are one of the people who encourages me to keep the twits coming. Some people may dislike you for this, but I endlessly appreciate it ;D

  11. Your tweets are always fun to read. They remind me of those ‘interesting’ experiences I once had with my toddlers. :)

    1. I rely on other mothers’ memories of having to do ludicrous things with their toddlers to give my tweets any kind of resonance. Thanks, Carrie ;D

      1. BTW, I still haven’t come up with anything for a possible guest post. Sorry. Just got a lot going on now. :)

  12. Deanna Herrmann · · Reply

    Cee uses Ranch for hair gel? Mine uses…..well whatever liquid mess he can concoct during dinner. Every dinner. :-)

    I usually miss your funny tweets because of that stupid time difference!

  13. Please explain the “remove the second letter” tweet.
    Is it too early for me to be reading tweets?

    1. There’s really nothing to explain. I thought I was funny. My husband read the tweet and told me that I was not.

  14. I’m a not-tweeter….I twitter not…no, no tweet… I just have to follow you here on 140+ character space.

    1. Beware. I’ll kill you faster here.

      1. Bring it ON! In 300+ words…

  15. Well, I’m infinitely more impressed about the HuffPo retweet than your playgroup. And I hope you know that if I ever actually looked at my Twitter feed, I’d be favoriting all your tweets. Unfortunately, since I never check my feed, you’ll just have to be satisfied with the knowledge of my intention.

    1. What’s bad is that I check Twitter all the time but I rarely actually check my feed and pay the tweety love forward. It’s a little one-sided.

  16. Congrats on being retweeted by HP. Holy cow! Mathair and I would be doing a jig or at least informing random strangers that we pass on the street. LOL We are now following you on Twitter and can’t wait for the next. :)

    1. Thanks! Followed back!

  17. Very cool – your tweets are hysterical! I’m heading over to follow you now. And congrats on being RT’ed by HP!

    1. Thank you! I have followed you back!

  18. I recently discovered the joys of tweeting. It’s a heck of a lot easier to tweet when your mom schedule becomes overloaded and you just don’t have time to write blog posts.

  19. So jealous of the HP tweet, but HAPPY for you! I love your tweets. They always make me smile. :)

  20. If only I’d had twitter when my kids were little… I might be famous today. Oh the material! ;-)

  21. Gosh, I just love twitter!! Your tweets are funny. One of my favs :)

  22. My last post was retweeted by a bowelofchiley. I was semi-excited until I found out it was an automatic twitter account that just retweeted anyone using the word bowel instead of bowl. At least mine was intentional. Twitter fame is fleeting.

Now you can hold the magic talking stick.

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