Miss C Emulates Gregor Samsa

Last night I had a bad dream. The sad thing about it is that I know that it will eventually be real.

In my dream I awoke like I do most mornings around 5:30 or 6 and went to the baby. In my dream, though, she wasn’t a little lump swaddled and sweetly sleeping in her bassinet. Over night she had grown from her current six week old state. She was at least 35 pounds and three feet tall. Her face had filled out; it was longer, more mature. Her hair was long and brown, her current soft dusting of hair replaced by brushable locks.

I pulled her out to feed her. My back ached at the strain of the lift that is normally so effortless. She wiggled out of my arms and promptly began toddling across the room. I didn’t know whether to feel proud that my baby was walking or horrified that she had acquired this skill overnight.

I went to B to show him what had happened and what she was doing. When we both returned to her, not only was she still walking, but she had somehow procured some of my clothes and had put them on. I was mortified. I told B to call the pediatrician. Something was very wrong. Babies shouldn’t grow like this.

He was calm. “This is only natural,” he replied.

I collected her in my arms and rocked her like a newborn. She struggled and ran off to play.

At that point I woke myself because I couldn’t stand it anymore.

This is probably the most easily interpreted dream I’ve ever had. This,

has turned into this,

in a matter of six weeks. And she’s not stopping for anyone.

It’s beautifully heartbreaking.


  1. Perhaps you saw that Time Magazine cover with the 3 year old kid sucking on his mommy and that freaked you out?

    1. I know you’re joking, but that very well may have something to do with it. That cover is wrecking very real havoc in the mom world. I’ve certainly read enough about it in the past few days that it HAS been on my mind!

      1. you guys have to read my friend’s post on it, it’s hilarious: http://jasongood.net/365/2012/05/from-breasts-to-boobs-and-back-again/ — i think the best thing written on that time piece so far…

        1. Awesome article! Thanks for sharing!

        2. Really good article, thanks for posting ;)

  2. People always say “They grow up SO fast!” And I didn’t believe them. Now my oldest is completing her freshman year, and Squish is big enough to climb up the BIG slide. *Sigh*

    1. I didn’t believe it either. I think it’s just something you have to personally experience to understand. :/

  3. Well, you’ve still got some time to play with her before she wants to borrow the car…
    Hope you enjoy every minute of it!

    1. LOL I know, right? It’s crazy!

  4. I’ve heard that if you keep them in a smaller bowl then they don’t grow as big. They only get as big as their surroundings let—

    No, that’s goldfish. Nevermind. I got nothin for you.

    1. Interestingly, we often refer to her as the little fish because of some faces she made right when she was born… :)

      1. I actually think that’s what they’re made for.

  5. Love the title of this post! Perhaps you’re having a little anxiety? It’s so unfair – when you want time to slow down so you can enjoy your baby it feels like you’re moving in light years and when you’re on each other’s last nerve (teen years) time moves like paint drying. At least you’re keenly aware of her metamorphosis — let’s just pray she doesn’t turn into a giant insect. Lol! So far, so good!

    1. Thanks! I’m quickly realizing that the anxiety I experience as a parent is nothing I could prepare myself for. But I suppose that’s a good thing because if we knew what we were getting into prior to having kids, we may chicken out before they even arrive. I’m sure she’ll seem like an insect at some point, but at least I’ll have all these precious moments to think back on to keep me from swatting at her with a newspaper ;)

  6. Daisy · · Reply

    Bet it was a relief to wake up & find she’s still as she was & at least not growing as quickly as in your dream! It’s true though, it goes so fast – I remember my brother being born & he’s 18 this year!


    1. It was a relief, and you better believe I rushed her side just to make sure it was just a dream. Parenthood will mess with your mind!

      Your exams should be over by now….hope they went really well and you’re enjoying a large “adult beverage” :)

      1. Daisy · · Reply

        Thanks, hope they went well but won’t think about them until results time in August! I haven’t had the pleasure of an adult beverage as yet but I did just enjoy a 4-hour nap!


  7. Oh Emily, this is priceless…..

    1. Ben got a kick out of it too!

  8. My two sons are now in high school and both are over 6′ tall. It seems like yesterday I was pushing them around in strollers. I know they say “it goes fast” but honestly one day you wake up and wonder how you got to where you are so quickly. You’re smart to be aware of your time with your daughter. Because once it passes, you never get it back. So enjoy every minute!

    1. My brother’s a big guy too, very tall and muscular. My mom says she can’t believed he was this tiny little guy once. She said it’s even more bizarre that I now have my own little girl! She still recounts with incredible clarity the moments when she was laboring with me (and she didn’t have a blog where she wrote it all down!) I totally get now why they say this time goes by so fast.

      1. Just wait until she’s in junior high. Then suddenly you’re on the bullet train!

  9. Thank god she didn’t turn into a cockroach. What a lovely child.

    1. I know…I’ve got enough spiders in our apartment already ;)

  10. Strange! They do grow and change so fast. I think my worst baby nightmare was that my daughter had fallen down the crack between the bed and wall, and I couldn’t get her out! I do miss the cuddle days but I’m also happy that at 14 (and needing to be so cool and independent), Isabella will still crawl into my lap. Enjoy these days as much as possible!

    1. I had that same dream a lot when we first brought her home from the hospital. I would awaken half-asleep and frantically fluff all the blankets looking for her, even though she was safely sleeping in the bassinet.

  11. This is such a sweet post. It’s amazing how much they grow in just a few weeks. Don’t blink!

    1. It really is amazing! Everyday she does something new. B and I have taken to calling them her “tricks.”

  12. krugthethinker · · Reply

    Oh, how beautiful indeed. Giver her big kisses from me.

    1. Will do! :D Had so much fun talking to you yesterday! Love you!

  13. she is so adorable it’s like too much. i mean that smiley face. COME ON. it’s overwhelming when god puts so much cuteness in one package. it’s like looking at the sun, nearly impossible. anyway, i loved this post. xoxo, sm

    1. Thank you! Her smiles are like crack…I can’t get enough of them.

      1. looool. crack indeed.

  14. Reading this, I could feel your fear. It’s how I feel when I look at my goddaughter who is walking, “talking”, and becoming so independent. I can only imagine how it feels to be the actual mother. Our parents probably felt the same way and still do. She is too cute which I’m sure you know already. Her smile is lovely!

    1. I know my mom still certainly feels that way. She told mesh can’t believe her baby just had a baby!

  15. Our 3 year old has us read “A Fish Out of Water” (you know, the infamous Otto outgrows every possible containment configuration) every day, every chance. Meanwhile, the 13 year old tonight copped to having grown certain non-facial hair nearly a year ago (“did the doctor know that when she checked you last year?” “um, yeah…”)…Gadamighty, they grow like weeds! Great pics!

    1. They do! They need to slow down! But of course if she DID slow down I’d probably freak out an panic too. You just can’t win.

  16. GAH! love her smooshy face! She’s beautiful

    1. Thank you! We made a cutie, despite the odds ;)

  17. AHHH. Look at that smile!! She’s so cute.

    1. Her smiles are way too addictive!

  18. Just stopped by to visit, am enjoying your posts! Enjoy every minute of watching lil’ girl grow grow grow!

    And I’m gonna blogroll you, ya! :)

    1. I’m glad you’re enjoying them. I’ve had a lot of fun writing them! Thanks for the blogroll ;)

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