Can you even believe I had planned on posting three times last week? I so silly. HA. I seem to have momentarily forgotten about the whole I-have-a-baby-now thing.
I’ve been busy trying to map out Miss C’s schedule, not to be confused with forcing her into a schedule. That would be the most fruitless endeavor I can come up with right now, on par with trying to chop down a tree with a herring. No, I’ve basically just been writing down every single thing she’s been doing and at what time, like when she goes to the bathroom, eats, and sleeps. At some point I will analyze all my data and make some graphs or something. I’m not entirely sure why exactly I’m collecting all this data. Maybe if she grows up to be a CPA or something else number-crunchery, she will appreciate the pie graphs in her baby book detailing her bowel movements. I don’t know.
Now make the baby eat, sleep, and poop at regular intervals!
But based on my overall energy level and lack of desire to cry whenever she does, I’d say things are going amazingly well. Dare I say I’m getting the hang of having an infant? Knock on wood.
She’s a pretty freaking awesome infant, to be sure. The only time she really goes into crisis-mode crying is when she is gassy, and even then she’s developed quite a virile colon that will deal with any discomfort she’s in posthaste. (I have been wanting to say “posthaste” for awhile.)
I am amazed at how I had taken for granted that we enter the world knowing nothing whatsoever. It is deliciously delightful to see Miss C observe the world for the first time. Yesterday, I parked her in her little rock n’ play thing next to the tub while I took a bath and she smiled and cooed at a bottle of Pantene and a green loofah for no less than 15 minutes. She is beyond fascinated with the paintings we have on our walls and she ADORES being on her changing table. She can be wailing, and we’ll just put her on her changing table, even if she’s not dirty, and immediately she’s happy and smiling. I will have to ask her what was so great about that when she can talk.
I am 100% sure I am jinxing myself by saying this, but she is actually beginning to *kind of* sleep like a normal person. The last few nights, she’s been out like a lamp no later than 10PM, and then she will occasionally sleep until 5 or 6AM, with only one quick midnight feed and diaper change. As much as I enjoy watching Shee-Ra at 2AM, I’d rather be sleeping.
If Karma is listening, I was just kidding. She sleeps horribly. I am so crabby from lack of sleep. Grrr.
In the past couple weeks, I have also discovered that the grossness of being projectile spat-upon is only matched in the hilarity of seeing one’s spouse being projectile spat upon. The other day I was reading in the bedroom when B yelled from the other room, “Help. NOW.” I came in the living room and both he and C were covered, I tell you, covered in spittup. I laughed like the apparent nine-year-old boy I am.
So things are really, really good. I’ll leave you with some pics from the last month.
Oh, AND the promise of an upcoming post about someone walking into a plate glass window. I’m really excited about it, if you couldn’t tell.
Keep feeling fascination.
After a bath, a frog tries to swallow the baby.
“Yeah, so I tells ’em, you gotta get a Boppy, too!”
Chillin’ on the changing table, AKA the happiest place on Earth
The Waiting 
I always said I knew I was a mom when I was HAPPY my kid threw up on me! I am so much easier to clean than the couch or the floor! Of course, now that they are adults, I am completely over that casual attitude about their bodily fluids. Sorry, but they are on their own that way now…
That is absolutely true about the spittup getting on YOU and not the upholstery! I know that I am going to be in the market for a sofa slipcover very soon, but I’d like to put it off as long as I can.
A friend got this cover that is designed to cover couches if you have pets. It covers the seat, the arms, well, everything. And it goes in the washer and dryer. I swear I am going to get one and I don’t let my dog on my couch. Instead I have people that insist on eating on the couch. But, to me, it looks easier to deal with than a slip cover. If company comes just whip it off and you are good! The one I saw was brown on one side and beige on the other. It takes a surprising number of years before they can stop throwing up just wherever they are.
Ahhhh, she is so cute! I am so glad things are going well. I love you guys! Also, about that person walking into a plate glass window…was it..Michael Scott? Because I heard he had some trouble with that at his condo.
Hahaha no :) It’s actually a drunk Korean call girl. Now you see why I’m so excited about this post.
I’m so glad she’s settling into a routine! Especially at night! Yay!
It is sweet relief indeed.
When you say “covered in spitup,” you mean “surrounded by adorable puppies,” right? Because that spitup thing doesn’t actually happen. Tell me it doesn’t happen.
Oh it happens. It happens. It shoots out of them like a Nerf toy.
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ADORABLE AND CUTE!!!! :)
Thanks! ;)
She is too darn cute for words! I too wrote down everything for the first 6 weeks and then stopped because I felt I was being a little ocd. My husband kept wondering what I was going to do with a log of all feedings, dirty/wet diapers, naps, etc.
Is that the Fisher Price Snugabunny swing she is in? We just got one about a week ago and I LOVE that thing so much because he loves it! It has been the only way I can have any free time to get things done.
Projectile spit up is so much better than projectile poop which we have lots of :) And, you are right there isn’t much of anything I have laughed so hard about ever than seeing hubby get projectile popped upon. I had tears streaming down my face. He wasnted to be mad but he was laughing at how hard I was laughing.
Being a parent is so much fun!!
It is the snuggabunny swing. We freaking love it too, as it is still the only thing she’ll sleep the night thru in! We’ve had it from the start and it has been a HUGE lifesaver. She adores it. I think I would too. It’s so cozy.
There is nothing better than getting a big hearty belly laugh at seeing your husband covered in baby body fluid! It kind of makes you know you married the right person :)
Wow, all night in the snugabunny! We don’t get that much time out of it but I sure wish we could. I think 20 minutes is the most we get at one time but I will gladly take it where I can. Hopefully at some point the play yard/pen will be something he does not mind being in for some time during the day so I can actually accomplish some tasks around the house.
Oh, by the by, I tagged you in a Mem on my blog. It was my last post. Don’t feel any rush to answer the questions. Just when you have a chance.
Awesome! I will check it out! Thanks :)
To be fair, I go into crisis-mode crying is when I am gassy.
She is so sweet. People must just be in love with that beautiful smile of hers.
Thanks. I know we are certainly in love with her smile. She has a penchant for smiling right when we’re about to lose it. I swear she knows what she’s doing.
Lol. Glad you are settling in. You’ll get over the writing things down eventually ( like with the second or third child:)
Thanks. To be honest, I’m kind of getting over it now, and B was over it the instant I showed him the spreadsheet I made.
She’s a seriously beautiful baby! Oh my! Isn’t it funny how all of a sudden you get reduced to poop, gas, spit, pee, etc.? That’s your new life!! : ) Those things pretty much define the first year. Haha!
Thank you! She is looking more and more like her dad everyday; I guess his genes pummeled mine. It really is amazing how body fluids become the norm. It is all I can do to spare the details of them on my blog, tweets, and FB updates.
Ah, the infamous frog. We have a duck that tries to eat my little one. Damn these aquatic demons! She truly is beautiful!!!
At least it’s not a Tasmanian devil or a wildebeest. That would be truly disturbing.
Hooray for Miss C being a good sleeper and giving her parents some rest. Beautiful baby!
Oh, I am lucky to post three times a week and my kids are 6 and 4. Give yourself a break and just keep those pie charts current. You could always post those. :-)
I may just do that. But it’s a slippery slope; I’d eventually start posting her math tests when she goes to school. Such does not make intriguing bloggy fodder, methinks. :)
Oh if only I had been half this witty when my kids were infants. Love the blog and the kid’s pretty neat too!
Hey, thanks! Sometimes all I have is my sense of humor :)
Posthaste, posthaste, posthaste!!! I’ve been wanting to say that for 10 years but got sidetracked by 4 kids and the hamster wheel of life. Thank you for inspiring and re-awakening me…
It’s fun to get these words out of our system! I want to be the adult Wordly Wise!
Oh so cute! I love the froggie. I’m glad the infant thing is going well for you so far. I’m also glad that you didn’t include any pictures of spit up related incidents.
Thanks. It’s all I can do not to take pictures of her spittup. I’ve already taken a few of her crying, and whenever B sees me doing this he can’t understand why. I just tell him that someday she will cry about way more complicated things like boys and getting a job, so it will be nice to look back at when all she had to cry about was gas.
Oh my god her little face! Keep posting!
it’s gonna be you soon, lady! One day your blog will be covered in sweet smiles (other than yours, of course!)
Aw, so cute! My kids got super happy on the changing table too! Maybe that’s why they poop so much?
If you’re still finding time to blog, I have to say you’re doing pretty damn awesome. I think at this point with both my kids I was barely getting my cereal to end up inside my mouth in the mornings.