Category Humor
Pregnancy Headquarters
Time to show a little appreciation for the place where it all goes down (or, err, comes up) during pregnancy: The bathroom! The lobby bathroom at the Field Museum in Chicago was recently rated the best public bathroom in the US. Now, you may shirk this off as a dubious honor, but when you think […]
Baby Mix
In compiling my (as always) *thorough* inventory of the human race, I have been able to discern two categories of parent. First is the parent whose identity seems to be completely encapsulated in their baby/child. EVERYTHING is geared towards their young. Weekend outings are limited to going exclusively to kids’ museums, Chuck E. Cheese’s, and […]
Wait, you mean pregnancy will eventually lead to delivery?
It has recently occurred to me that my pregnancy is eventually going to reach the point where the baby is going to have to come out. My nether-regions are going to automatically contract and stretch without me telling them to and a huge mountain of living flesh is going to be pushed through a hole that […]
Notes on the 15th Week
Sorry for the nearly week-long hiatus. I’ve been having pregnancy headaches lately and they seem to be exacerbated when I sit in front of the compy for longer than, like, 10 minutes. I have several close friends who have lived with real-deal migraines since childhood, so I don’t dare compare my pee wee head ouchies […]
It’s PAT!
Lately with all the positive news from the doctor about the progress of the pregnancy and mine and the baby’s health, my mind has been able to take a break from worrying and focus entirely on the gender of Bebe. As we all know, the more I think about it the more likely the sky […]
Why I have confidence that the world doesn’t suck
The timing couldn’t have been more perfect. Just when I had started contemplating how this baby I will introduce into the world in April will live in a place where politics are a farce, the planet’s ecology is taken about as seriously as a Hollywood marriage, and public education is equally as laughable, my faith […]
Pregnancy Dreams of the Deranged Variety
We’ve now made it to the second trimester – YAY! I am looking forward to all the good things the next three months will hopefully bring: desire to eat normal food, a bit more energy, and (can I say this?), a renewed interest in sex. Needless to say, the last week has been nice, with […]
As if this were the only reason our baby will be awesome
Monday I finally saw my sweet lil’ perfect globule! Most exciting moment possibly EVER. Definitely on par with making a walk down the aisle, if that’s your cup o’ tea. I was so giddy and nervous at the same time to see Bebe because, well, I’m meeting my and B’s miracle! And so do you […]
Why Subway is Better Than American Healthcare
In the women’s health industry, pregnancy-based issues are considered especially great opportunities for subjective misery. In Fayetteville, the particularly irate woman who is subject to these miseries comprises an individual squad known as Emily. This is her story. So yesterday we finally made the trip to the OB-GYN to see what exactly is going on. Do […]
All Hail Emily, Queen of the Muffin Top
It was bound to happen eventually. I am nearing the end of my first trimester, after all. I have known that at some point I would have to part with my normal, cute wardrobe. And I dreaded it, not out of a fear of pregnant corpulence but because I like my clothes. But it’s started: I […]
The Waiting 