Category Humor
Notes on the 28th Week
We have now entered the part of pregnancy when the products start to arrive. Although our apartment doesn’t quite look like a Babies ‘R’ Us yet, we have acquired a few new items that would indicate the presence of germy offspring to a prowler. Although I doubt it, the risk of pilfering a laptop or […]
These are a few of my favorite memes
When Maria took those old curtains and whipped them up into new playclothes for the Von Trapp children, she took some random material and made them into something hilarious and borderline offensive. By getting inspired by the ugliness that surrounded her and duplicating it at least seven times, she was one of the original meme […]
Correspondence
Dear Facebook Friends, You are not Jimmy Fallon. Please stop writing “pithy” and “pointed” requests to inanimate objects. Love, Emily **** Dear Facebook Friends, The USPS is in enough trouble. Kindly mail your stupid letters to the intended recipients rather than spray them to everyone you know. Love, Emily **** Real post later today.
The Troll Under the Bridge
I like to read comments. It’s a bit of a hobby. Reading an article or a status update or watching a video is *edifying* and all, but it’s in the comments that the fun really begins. That’s why you should wait awhile after an item has been published online to read it; the comments will […]
Won’t stop ’til I get enough
I was born in 1982, a year that was especially auspicious for me because of its ripe placement at the beginning of the 80s. In 1982, the Decade of Excess was solidly coming into itself as gaudy, strange, and smart. It had firmly decided that its bridesmaids would sport day glow, it was OK for […]
Gingivitis Friday
Today we awoke to find that we were out of mouthwash, a staple in our home. Possibly because we spent some time in Korea where almost everyone brushes after every single meal, B and I are anal about our teeth (OK, note to self, “anal about your teeth” should not be a thing. Ewww.) Because […]
Tips on Compiling a Baby Registry
One of the many things I’m experiencing now that I’m halfway through my pregnancy is that of creating the registry for little Bebe. Yes, there are few joys during pregnancy that approach that of shopping around for things that you have absolutely no idea if you will end up needing or the baby will like. […]
Introducing: Dung Chim
Being a little kid is the absolute best (and sometimes, worst) thing possible. Yeah, you don’t have a lot of control over your life, but that frees you up to unabashedly explore all the weirdness you’re surrounded by without being self-conscious about it. You can watch your Barbie video four times in a row, loving […]
Little Kicks
Is it even worth it to describe to someone who’s never experienced (and doesn’t care to experience) the emotional weight of what it feels like to have a baby move around inside them, what it feels like? (I dare you to diagram that sentence!) Going on and on about it to non-breeders kind of makes […]
Baptism by Spit Up
I feel like there are a few must-address subjects when blogging about pregnancy. The first few are from the first trimester and tend to focus on how your body is turning on you and there’s nothing you can do about it. First, morning sickness, joy of all joys. Check. Next, gaining weight. Gotta love that fatty […]
The Waiting 